I honestly did not think it was funny

Today somebody sent us a link to an Australian newspaper article and I also found the video clip that it relates to. I was shocked to see how some people could make fun of terminally ill children, how they think it can be funny. Okay fair enough, to them this is just a comedy show, and they say things like "...helping kids lower their expectations in the face of death" and "why go to the trouble if they are going to die anyway?" and they think this is funny?

So here is my message to these idiots who had a laugh at our expense:

I struggle to comprehend how you can think this is funny. I'm trying to find anything funny that relates to my little girl, Bianca's cancer treatment the past 2 years and... no, nothing. I can't find anything funny about hearing the devastating diagnosis and standing in the corridor trying my hardest not to cry as tears streamed down my face. It wasn't funny when I woke up that Tuesday morning thinking "oh what a horrible nightmare", just to realise that this was real, it was very very real.

It wasn't funny when she "celebrated" her 4th birthday party in hospital with kids she never met before and asking me why her friends weren't there.

It wasn't funny when she had to get one injection after another into her little legs and we had to hold her and we could see her little heart beating in her chest and she cried and told me "but Mommy it will be sore" and all you could do is to say "I know, but your soldiers need this medicine to get better".

It wasn't funny when Bianca was stuck in hospital for one infection after another totalling 113 days to date.

It isn't funny knowing your child gets chemo that can help fight their cancer, but that can possibly let them develop another cancer later on, cause heart problems, growth problems, learning, concentration and memory problems or even take away her ability to one day have kids of her own.

I can't find anything funny about her being on oxygen and the doctors talking about the possibility of ICU.

I can't find anything funny about having to hold her down as they put a nose tube down her nose and watching her fight and scream and finally looking utterly defeated and betrayed, and certainly there was nothing funny about how lousy I felt for being unable to protect her from these people doing these things to her.

I don't find anything funny about when she suffered a severe allergic reaction to one of her chemo drugs that required immediate assistance.

It certainly wasn't funny when she suffered a broncospasm and one moment she was playing, suddenly she started having a coughing fit and the next she becomes unresponsive and needing immediate assistance until she woke up again.

It wasn't funny when she got shingles in her face and as a result was in hospital for around 3 weeks and has had to take anti-viral tablets 4 times a day every day for the past year.

None of that was funny! I most definitely did not laugh during those moments!

We look at her beads, and none of that is funny, although it certainly is a testament to her bravery, it reminds us of the countless bloodtests, all the other tests, procedures, days of chemo and so many other things. But it is also a reminder that she should never have had cancer in the first place.

She is only a child, but she was forced to deal with such an incredibly big, devastating thing. She is dealing with a life-threatening illness when most children are just being kids. We hope for the best and all we can do is to believe that her treatment will be successful, but I can assure you there is nothing funny about the fears we have to deal with every single day of our lives.

Could you (The Chasers) honestly look into my little girl's eyes, laugh at her and say "lower your expectations" and "why go to all the trouble?"

I can assure you that for each and every one of us having to deal with child cancer - this is no laughing matter, it is real, it is scary, it is horrible, and we will most certainly go to all the trouble and more, we will sacrifice our lives for our kids if we could, we would gladly take their place if we could.

Right now I can supply you an incredibly long list of parents who walk this journey that we walk, some who unfortunately and sadly have lost their kids to this horrible disease, some who walked this journey, but had to face the reality of a relapse and are now again walking this journey, but this time so much harder and so much more intense.

But you know what (The Chasers)? My little girl is a much bigger person than you will ever be, despite having to deal with the harsh realities, the fears, the pain, the isolation, the side-effects, despite having to cope with so much more than you will ever have to cope with in your lifetime. She is the most amazing, inspiring little girl I know. She doesn't ever complain, she'll cry when something is sore or scary, but she will recover from that and move on and she always finds a way to make the best of life, to laugh and to smile.

She doesn't make fun of people who are forced to go through a certain situation. She never asks "why me?", she never mourns the life she had before she became sick. Sure she has dreams, she would very much like a puppy or a kitten, but right now she can't have either. She asked today when she'll be able to learn how to skateboard and she had to accept that she needs to wait until she doesn't have the risk of low platelets anymore. There was a time where for around 8 months she couldn't really be around other kids and she sat at the top of the slide wishing she had friends who could come and play with her. She wants to be able to run like other kids, to get to the ball before they do, but she accepts that the drugs affect the way she runs, and that she simply cannot do it as well as others. Yet, that doesn't stop her from participating (even if it means being completely last). She has never made any request that was in any way greedy. Sure, she has dreams and ambitions (like we all do) and we will be eternally grateful that the Make-a-Wish foundation was able to grant her a wish and that regardless of what lies around the corner, that was the day she forgot she was sick.

I don't wish this journey on anybody, not even my worst enemy. Whilst we have found a way to make this manageable, it most definitely is not easy. It is devastating, it is hard, it is challenging, you cannot even begin to imagine. But I hope that if you ever have to fight cancer or have a child with cancer (which I sincerely hope don't ever happen to you or a child of yours), I hope that you will be reminded of your question "why go to all the trouble?" and see how you would feel if you were in our shoes... I bet it won't be so funny then anymore.